continue...
(please pardon me,
but this one
is very wordy!)
It was my birthday...
a good half year
had elapsed
since my daughter
was diagnosed
with Lyme,
and it was about
8 months since normal had ceased
to exist in her life
and in ours.
My heart was really overwhelmed
that evening
as we prepared
for Bible study
with our church family.
I was exhausted
in my soul,
and would have loved to finish the day
curled up in a
fleece throw
by the fire
instead of going out
into the cold,
dark night.
I was so tired of needing to
make decisions about her health, and I was emotionally
weary from weathering a storm I had been
very unprepared for!
But I am 39 now, a big girl, right?
I always feel like doing the right thing.
Hee hee. Not.
(I think by now my starry eyed
visions from youth that a woman of
40 is over the fleshly feelings,
have long vanished and I have
accepted the fact that there will
always be feelings to lay aside
for the greater good,
and to do the right thing!)
As we drove the 45 minutes to
where Bible study was to be held
that evening, I wondered what I
was doing even going. I felt so
drained emotionally that I knew
I didn't have anything of my own to give.
But I have lived long enough to have memories
of other, similar experiences where God
had surprises and good things in store,
and where He gave grace more than
abundant for what I needed,
and so I committed my way to the Lord.
The brother in charge of the service
had a rather 'out of the box' assignment
to give us relating to the gifts in the Body,
and in my weary-of-heart state,
it looked huge to me. I wondered how
I would ever accomplish the fairly
simple thing he asked of us,
especially since the assignment,
combined with my heart ache, served to
bring alot of old feelings to the
surface that I have dealt
with in times past, and put to rest.
I felt completely annoyed that
I should have to deal with that
on top of everything else!
Again, I chose to commit my will
to God, and let Him bring whatever
circumstance He thought I needed.
But before we were to fulfill the assignment,
we separated into groups for prayer.
The lady at whose house we gathered,
a good friend to me,
led the prayer time.
As she prayed, she asked God's favor on me
on my birthday, and then continued to
completely surprise me by praying for
my family and my daughter in her illness
(you see, up until now, we had been struggling as a
family but not really sharing alot because it was
confusing even to us, although people knew
that she was sick, but not how it really was
affecting us all in our home,
so this dear friend had no idea just what she
was praying!)
I was moved to tears. And I began to weep.
In fact, I was weeping so hard, that by the time
it was my turn,
(I was third in line. A sweet little lady of 11
prayed before me and also included me and my
family in her simple prayer)
I could not pray.
So they skipped my turn and all 4 ladies
who prayed after that, each prayed for me
and for the situation/my family.
I was completely overcome with gratitude
to God who knows what we need,
and can use even those who don't know
just how He is using them!
I was able to complete the assignment
I was given during the teaching time,
and afterwards, as we ladies sat visiting,
the friend who began the prayer time
asked me if I was ok, and when I said
that I was not, she wanted to know
if I wanted to talk.
I chose to share my heart with these sisters
and it was a real blessing to be able to
give them a picture of what was going on.
During that week, we also had a few others
asking specifically how things were going,
and I had opportunity to share honestly
that we were really being pressed
at the present time. They all assured us of
love and prayers.
The Sunday following that Bible study,
a brother in church took the opportunity to
pray for healing for my daughter,
and for grace for our family to walk
through this experience.
He assured us that she was going to be
his prayer 'person' the following week.
That was 2 weeks ago.
She has had more normal living
since that time,
more normal than we have
known for almost a year.
The effectual, fervent prayer
of the righteous avails much.
I am blessed to be surrounded
by community that cares
and who knows the God
who has allowed this experience
to be in our home.
Thank you to my friends
for praying, and for caring.
I am so very blessed, and
I thank God for you.
Community.
What a special blessing.
How are we using that gift?
Are we contributing to it
with the gifts God has
blessed us with?
What richness can be had,
when we choose to
be where and how God
calls us to be!
"You are the God who does wonders;
You have declared your strength
among the people."
Psalm 77:14
